Work (3rd August 2020)

I am not at the moment. And it scares me

I last earned any money a year ago and have been living off savings

It wasn’t the intention. I finished work and planned to find something else immediately and then I met J and life changed

Work didn’t seem important and I enjoyed our life

Work was my old life and I didn’t want it back

But I had to but decided to give myself Christmas before life had to get serious again especially as I had surgery in December

I started looking after and had a couple of jobs of jobs lined up and then Covid happened

Then I split with J and came home as I thought I had a job but that fell through to

Money is worrying me and I have been procrastinating, I admit it

Again interviews went well and jobs still didn’t happen

Today I have focused on sending out an updated CV to agencies which should hit half of the inboxes tomorrow with the rest on Wednesday

It was all very positive

Then I had a call from an agency today who basically told me I was past it and should get a job in a supermarket

I feel old and past it which is basically what the agency told me

I have to find a job this month

This house is sucking my cash and the life out of me

And I don’t even want to be here